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Proverbs 3:1-2 (NKJV)
1 My son, do not forget my law, But let your heart keep my commands; 2 For length of days and long life And peace they will add to you.
For the last number of weeks we have been considering the lessons which fathers teach us as the people of God. And here in our text we find a critical lesson – fathers serve as our teachers, our instructors. It is fathers who are to pass down to their children laws and precepts, commands and ordinances. My son, do not forget my law, But let your heart keep my commands; Why? For length of days and long life And peace they will add to you. The very principles given by fathers to their children add length of days and long life and peace to the next generation.
Children are exhorted by God Himself, “Honor your father and your mother, that it may go well with you and that you may live long on the earth.” And so now Solomon gives a window into one way that the honor which children show their parents translates into long life. Fathers give commands to their children and these commands preserve their children from sorrow and trouble. Children, you know the nature of some of these commands. “Junior, don’t play ball in the middle of the freeway; don’t touch the stove when it’s hot; don’t stand in front of the microwave; don’t waste your time playing games all day.” The function of these commands is to protect and preserve your lives – and, as you honor and obey your parents, your lives are extended.
The entrusting of spiritual principles to our children is no less life giving. God is the Lord. He governs in the affairs of men. And so as we fathers teach our children to know and love and serve and worship the Living God, we are teaching them how the world works, how to preserve their life from trouble, to guard their souls from destruction. “Junior, worship the Triune God alone, make sure that you gather together to worship the Lord on the Lord’s Day, don’t steal your brother’s bike, remember who made the heavens and the earth and all that is in them, pray regularly.” These precepts as much and more than the pragmatic, day to day precepts, preserve the lives of our children from destruction and add to them length of days.
One of the tools which our fathers have passed down to us to help new generations of fathers instruct their children in these basic spiritual principles is a catechism. A catechism is a means of summarizing essential truths of the Christian faith in question and answer format so that fathers (and mothers) can use these questions and answers to instruct their children in the ways of the Lord. “What is God? God is a Spirit, infinite, eternal and unchangeable in His being, wisdom, power, holiness, justice, goodness, and truth.”
For the past few years, our congregation has recited the Heidelberg Catechism each Lord’s Day. This year we are switching to the Westminster Shorter Catechism. Both catechisms accomplish the same basic task. Their function is to summarize some of the basic truths of Scripture. And because we want these truths taught not just in the congregation but in the homes of our congregation, we are switching this year to the Westminister Shorter Catechism. Why? Because those of you who have small children uniformly use the Shorter Catechism rather than the Heidelberg Catechism – and the elders want to do all we can to encourage and buttress the work you are doing of having your children memorize the catechism. Again, why? Because length of days and long life and peace they will add to us and to our children.
Reminded that our responsibility is to bring up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, to give them the words of life that their lives might be full of the grace of God and the knowledge of Christ, and reminded as children that our responsibility is to honor and respect and give heed to the teaching we receive, let us kneel and confess our failure to do these things to the Lord.
Proverbs 3:11-12 (NKJV)
11 My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest His correction; 12 For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.
Last week we learned that the reason God puts His childen through trials and tribulations, the reason that He chastises us, is because He loves us. God is absolutely sovereign, absolutely in control of each and every event, good or bad, which befalls us. Hence, no matter what we are experiencing, we can be assured that God intends it for our good – regardless the motives of others involved.
Today, I would like to turn our passage to the direct issue which it is addressing – discipline in the home. We have been meditating upon the lessons which the fathers of Israel are to teach us as the people of God. And here in our text is one of them – fathers teach us about our Heavenly Father.
Solomon words are quite plain: “For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.” A righteous father, one who loves and cherishes his children, is one who is concerned for each child’s spiritual and personal growth and maturity. A father knows that “foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child” and so he utilizes discpline to “drive” this foolishness far away from him. And the practice of fathers in performing this salutary function for their children teaches us, teaches the entire community, about God Himself and His determination to sanctify us, to make us increasingly men and women of character by disciplining us.
So fathers, how are we doing? Are we engaged with the discipline of our children? Are we concerned for them? Or are we distracted by other things, thinking that other things are more important? Hear the Word of God: he who fails to correct his son hates his son.
But not only must we be engaged in discipline, we must also be engaged in a way that glorifies our Father in heaven, that imitates His character toward His children. Hence, our discipline must always be for the good of our children – must be designed to bless them and strengthen them and make them ever more faithful servants of Christ Jesus. Discpline is supposed to be a gift.
So what are ways we can be tempted to distort this? Our chief temptation is to discipline our children not for their good but for our good. So we discipline them to get them out of our hair – to prevent them from disturbing our tranquility or our enjoyment of some other activity. Or we discipline them because we are frustrated with ourselves or with our day at work – we take out our frustration on them. Or we discipline them because we are concerned what others might think of us, because we are embarrassed by their behavior. In all these cases, the discipline is for us rather than for them – but this is not how our Heavenly Father treats us. Consequently, if we discpline our children this way, we are teaching a false Gospel, a Gospel that says, “God is so concerned about Himself that He has no time for His creatures.” Let us teach a true Gospel, a Gospel that says, “God is so happy in Himself that He has abundant time to lavish affection on each of His children.”
And for you children out there, remember that this passage teaches you an important lesson – if your parents love you, they will discipline you. It is the permissive parent, the parent who says, “Oh do what you like I don’t really care” who truly doesn’t care. So when your parents hold you accountable, when they discipline you and give you consequences for your behavior, be sure to thank them for loving you and caring for you. Discpline is a gift – and we all know to say thank you when we’re given a gift.
Reminded that we engage with those we truly love, let us kneel and confess that we have failed to love our children as we ought, failed to respect our parents as we ought.
Does God Love Us or Hate Us?
December 27, 2010 in Bible - OT - Proverbs, Meditations, Sovereignty of God, TrialsProverbs 3:11-12 (NKJV)
11 My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest His correction; 12 For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.
One of the great consolations that attends a deeper awareness of God’s sovereignty and control over all of life – over the good and the bad, the favorable and the unfavorable providences – is the knowledge that no matter what is happening God is in control. God is on His Holy Hill – He shall not be moved. He who causes the constellations to do His bidding shall even so cause the sons of men to go where He wills and do what He desires.
Solomon uses the knowledge of God’s exhaustive sovereignty to comfort his son, to remind his son how to respond to hard providences. He urges him, “Do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor detest His corrections.” When hard providences come, don’t kick against the goads; don’t shake your fist at God; don’t be like Job’s wife, cursing God and dying.
Why not? Well here it is necessary to make an important distinction. For those who are in rebellion against God, who do not love Him nor desire to serve Him through Christ, the Scripture offers little comfort. As we read in Psalm 7, God is angry with the wicked every day. In so far as we are in rebellion against God, hard providences are not signs of God’s love and care but His judgment. Our response, therefore, ought not to be to comfort ourselves that this suffering has some purpose but rather to repent and acknowledge that we have failed to love and honor our Creator as we ought.
However, provided that our relationship to God is not one of “rebel to lawful Lord” but rather one of “son to father”, Solomon assures us that the hard providences we face are no longer a sign of His wrath and anger but His love. “For whom the Lord loves He corrects, just as a father the son in whom he delights.”
So what challenges are you facing? What hard providences? Here is Solomon’s word to you: God has you in that situation. Make no mistake about it – God is absolutely sovereign. This situation didn’t catch Him by surprise. He crafted this providence just for you. So the question is, did He craft it just for you because He loves you or because He hates you? That’s the question. Did God put this trial in your path because He loves you or because He hates you? If you are God’s child, trusting in Him through Christ our Lord, then the promise is that He has you there because He loves you. So our call is to trust that He knows exactly what He is doing and that He is orchestrating this for our good.
But we often respond to hard providences in unbelief, do we not? We imagine that we are victims of others’ folly; victims of unseen powers; even victims of our own folly. And no doubt God does sometimes use these means to bring us where we are. But make no mistake – God is the One who brought us here. Hence, the call to endure hard providences is a call to faith – to believe that the God who has given us this hard providence is our Father who loves us and has put this providence in our path for our good and not for our destruction. “For whom the Lord loves He chastens, even as a father the son in whom he delights.”
Reminded that we often fail to trust God in the midst of our trials, let us kneel and confess our sin to the Lord.